Avoiding academic suicide

I can't go back to sleep. I'm anxious. I can't relax. In bed, I'm twisting and turning so I'm up. Don't want to wake up my partner. I'm hungover from last night's liquid comfort (tequila and beer). I'm tanking down so much water right now (and some ibuprofen). The sun's not up and I'll be groggy all day until I go off to work at 3:30 pm. I hope I can go back to sleep eventually this morning and cuddle up my males (partner and cat).

As a sexology student at U.Q.A.M., my studies' department is part of the Humanities study field like psychology, sociology and political sciences. A.F.E.S.H. (Association facultaire étudiante des sciences humaines), my student association, will be pursuing the student strike that's been going for several months now. A.F.E.S.H. is one of the most extremist in its technics for voicing its positions. At the general assembly yesterday, a vote went through. We even have C.L.A.S.S.E. (That one is an other pair of sleeves: "une autre paire de manches") I use the term "We" because I'm part of the association. As a student in this association, I can voice my opinion and I can vote. I pay an annual subscription to be part of it and that my rights as a student can be promoted and defended individually and collectively (that last part comes from A.F.E.S.H.'s Facebook page About).

I remember why the strike and protests began.

I remember what we were striving for.

I remember we were strong.

I remember... that's it, now. I just remember.

The student strike is not working anymore. The government ain't listening, the Liberals are actually using this social crisis to their advantage. "Let's keep the strike going for those Liberals to stay in power!" Used tactics need to be pushed up, changed, upgraded, bettered. I feel that my student association isn't even listening neither.

I don't feel represented.

I don't feel defended.

I don't feel being heard.

I don't feel like a student anymore.

I don't feel like a student anymore, where I'm standing now. 

With an unlimited strike ahead, there will be uncertainties again. There will be arguing again. Students picketing U.Q.A.M.'s doors. Teachers debating to give their classes. Protests, riots and police. I JUST WANT TO CONTINUE MY DEGREE. Where's my right for that? I believe there's a way to protest against the increases but still continue our education. I don't believe it's having my cake and eating too. I believe it's using our brains.

I quit being a full-time student and I'm taking a step back. As Southpark's Cartman says: "Screw you guys, I'm going home."

I was waiting for this general assembly's vote result to take a decision. I'm stepping down because this shit isn't for me anymore. I'm loosing my taste to pursue my degree. My motivation is disappearing and if my drive would actually be an image of me driving a car: I'm stepping down hard on the brakes so I don't hit the wall. My body and my mind are tired from the anxiety and the uncertainty which result from these ungoing disputes where no one is actually listening anymore. A.F.E.S.H. isn't representing my views.

I'm taking a year off before I academically suicide!